Book Review: The Power of a Positive No: How to say NO and still get to YES

Author: William Ury                                 www.williamury.com  

Some time ago I promised a review of Mr. Ury’s latest book…so here we go.

First things first. If you are serious about becoming a better negotiator at anything in life, read this book.

You might remember that Mr. Ury is the author of “Getting to Yes”, which is arguably the standard in negotiation texts. He leads the highly regarded Global Negotiating Project at Harvard University and has a outstanding collection of experiences that he shares liberally with us in his new book. For me the great benefit of that experience is that Mr. Ury walks the walk. Too many negotiating “gurus” out there rely on slickness and the repackaging of ancient wisdom, (often without attribution), to shout their negotiating “product” at us.

Mr. Ury offers sound and thoughtful advice throughout the book. Perhaps one of the most redeeming values of the book may be that he applies his techniques to everyday and personal situations as well as the boardroom or global conflicts. He helps us to understand that the tools for improving our negotiating skills are often very basic and are available for everyone. Not to mix reviews here but I am reminded of the animated movie “Ratatouille”, where a famous chef has a cookbook “Anyone can Cook” . With Mr. Ury’s book in hand the argument can be made that anyone can negotiate. He offers tips and tools that are easily aimed at our everyday lives. Much of it is ancient wisdom indeed but presented rather than packaged.

Starting with a definition about our basic, fundamental beliefs, he helps us to build a “NO” to certain demands and proposals. By building upon a strongly and comfortably  held core belief we are able to say Yes to we then understand what we are willing to say No to and are available to build the skills he suggests in order to do so.

From that basic Yes ->No,  Ury then helps us move the negotiation along anyways…with a proposal we can say Yes to. He defines it as: YesàNoàYes?

Mr. Ury offers excellent and comfortably presented tips for communicating and interacting with others at any level in virtually any type of negotiation…from your Kindergartener to the CEO.  His promotion of saying Yes to yourself, (and your core beliefs), as a precursor to saying No in a negotiation, helps the negotiator reduce the edginess and confrontational aspect of the “No”. Too often a “No” can seem like a confrontational and yet coy approach to the negotiation process. Arrogance creeps in. The core belief is in winning and maximization. Read Mr. Ury’s book, take his advice and discover that how you play the negotiating game can matter more than the outcome.

© 2007 Burt Hadlock

tags:
positve no,
getting to yes,
Negotiating,
william ury

Review: What Color Is Your Parachute? 2007

I spent some time over the weekend with the great job and career resource that is the book, “What Color Is Your Parachute 2007”.

This version is the thirty-sixth annual edition of this powerful career guide.

It is beyond my skills as a writer to heap higher praise on the book than has already been offered by so many. My intent with this piece is to offer some user advice on how to deploy Mr. Bolle’s wisdom in a negotiation.

The good news is that there is a chapter on negotiating salary in the book. Jumping to chapter 7 to understand salary negotiation would be a dangerous shortcut however.

The author acknowledges early on in the chapter that entire books are written on the topic of negotiating but goes on to offer a distilled guide to negotiating salaries. He offers six secrets on negotiating as the guides to success in salary negotiations.

These secrets are spelled out over twenty pages with some treatment as to how to deploy them. They are sound principles that have been identified by a number of experts in numerous volumes and forms over the years.  Any weakness comes from the hazard presented should a reader deploy these tactics solely based on their presentation in the chapter. Precious little space is given to application and skill building. Taken alone the chapter would be woefully insufficient training or guidance in a salary negotiation.

My advice is two fold:

1. Read the whole book. It is a wonderful guide to career management and job seeking. It should go without saying that no chapter should be asked to stand alone. The remainder of the book is full of invaluable guidance to the interviewing, research and self analysis that will instruct your negotiation. The book as a whole is a fine salary negotiation reference…just don’t rely on the single chapter.
2. For that matter, don’t rely on this single book as your negotiating platform. Read books dedicated to negotiating and apply one that resonates to your career negotiation.

 

Finally I would add that “Parachute” has salary as the primary negotiating focus. I prefer to use compensation as the euphemism for the negotiation objective. Salary is an important component in overall compensation but individual circumstances may dictate other components to be of equal or greater value in your efforts to maximize the offer. Consider components such as commute/telecommuting, stock, expense allowances, vacation time, and many others as more than “fringe” benefits.  At certain points in your life these variables change in meaning and value. Flex time or proximity to home may mean more to the parent of active children than the non-parent. Your cost of living may allow for a larger mix of stock and bonuses than someone who needs a larger cash flow from maximized salary.

There are no equations or graphics to define that for you. Use the skills associated with the rest of the book and other resources to determine what “color” your compensation should be. Then use solid skills to negotiate the compensation package best suited for your life circumstances.

© 2007 Burt Hadlock

tags:
bolles,
What Color Is Your Parachute,
career guide,
book review