Author: William Ury www.williamury.com
Some time ago I promised a review of Mr. Ury’s latest book…so here we go.
First things first. If you are serious about becoming a better negotiator at anything in life, read this book.
You might remember that Mr. Ury is the author of “Getting to Yes”, which is arguably the standard in negotiation texts. He leads the highly regarded Global Negotiating Project at Harvard University and has a outstanding collection of experiences that he shares liberally with us in his new book. For me the great benefit of that experience is that Mr. Ury walks the walk. Too many negotiating “gurus” out there rely on slickness and the repackaging of ancient wisdom, (often without attribution), to shout their negotiating “product” at us.
Mr. Ury offers sound and thoughtful advice throughout the book. Perhaps one of the most redeeming values of the book may be that he applies his techniques to everyday and personal situations as well as the boardroom or global conflicts. He helps us to understand that the tools for improving our negotiating skills are often very basic and are available for everyone. Not to mix reviews here but I am reminded of the animated movie “Ratatouille”, where a famous chef has a cookbook “Anyone can Cook” . With Mr. Ury’s book in hand the argument can be made that anyone can negotiate. He offers tips and tools that are easily aimed at our everyday lives. Much of it is ancient wisdom indeed but presented rather than packaged.
Starting with a definition about our basic, fundamental beliefs, he helps us to build a “NO” to certain demands and proposals. By building upon a strongly and comfortably held core belief we are able to say Yes to we then understand what we are willing to say No to and are available to build the skills he suggests in order to do so.
From that basic Yes ->No, Ury then helps us move the negotiation along anyways…with a proposal we can say Yes to. He defines it as: YesàNoàYes?
Mr. Ury offers excellent and comfortably presented tips for communicating and interacting with others at any level in virtually any type of negotiation…from your Kindergartener to the CEO. His promotion of saying Yes to yourself, (and your core beliefs), as a precursor to saying No in a negotiation, helps the negotiator reduce the edginess and confrontational aspect of the “No”. Too often a “No” can seem like a confrontational and yet coy approach to the negotiation process. Arrogance creeps in. The core belief is in winning and maximization. Read Mr. Ury’s book, take his advice and discover that how you play the negotiating game can matter more than the outcome.
© 2007 Burt Hadlock
tags:
positve no,
getting to yes,
Negotiating,
william ury
